She slipped a note in my bag, “Thanks for listening. I never talk to anyone about my past.”
I stared across the desert plains. An expanse of sand and rock that never seemed to reach an end, reds and browns and yellows with little spurts of green from the cactus and varied bushes.
We were driving away from the indigenous reservation we served for too short a time. A remote desert community filled with poverty, addiction, and other challenges.
I met a woman who had run away due to domestic violence. A man whose past was filled with drugs and alcohol. We helped lead a week-long kids club, added paint to some rooms of the local church, and fixed the roof of an older woman whose shingles would rip out during heavy winds.
As I looked out the window at the stretch of desert, I was reminded of the words from Yeonmi Park’s speech during the One Young World Summit 2014. She shared her story of escaping North Korea in search of freedom.
“When I was crossing the Gobi desert, scared of dying, I thought nobody in this world cared. It seemed that only the stars were with me. But you have listened to my story. You have cared. Thank you very much.” – Yeonmi Park
The power of those words. “You have listened to my story. You have cared.”
To listen is to care. To listen is to acknowledge a person’s voice and presence.
I thought of the young girl who slipped the note in my bag. She shared her story with me and all I could do in that moment was listen. I wanted to do more, I wanted to sweep all the broken pieces of her life away. But that’s not possible.
I now carry her story with me, and I now carry the burden to care.
It’s been a few days since I had to say goodbye to the reservation. It’s given me time to research practical ways to help. There are many ways, but I’ll mention three to start. Add more ways to help Natives in the comments section if you have any.
- Educate Yourself. Go to the indigenous reservation and Native community organizations. Learn about the culture and history.
- Support Others. Buy art, jewelry, clothing made by Native people. Don’t buy from vendors who are taking advantage of Native culture.
- Donate Money. Financially support Native communities that often live amidst poverty. Use Charity Navigator to learn more about the different organizations you can donate to. This website reviews charities based on accountability, transparency, and other factors.
“Thanks for listening. I never talk to anyone about my past.”
I might never know what it’s like to be in a violent relationship or having drug problems, but what stuck out to me is the feeling of not being heard and afraid of people making you feel dumb, not caring, or respecting to what I have to say. Sometimes my family pointed out how I treated them when I did wrong to them or to another. I recently learned how to hear others without shutting them up or being offended and take time to listen and not wait to reply.
There are times when I get offensive to what my family says, but in actuality, it’s for my best interest when they want to make sure or double-check on something important like how certain systems work with the Taxi’s systems for the elderly and disabled.
I am sorry if this is not relevant to the article. It’s just that not being heard is the worse feeling in the world
It’s relevant because you’re relevant! Thanks for sharing Josh!
Oh man, your writing and actions are so deep and very impactful. Dude! I almost cried reading this. I know you told me about this interaction, but hearing it again, man, it’s BEAUTIFUL. I have heard so many natives say, “I thought nobody cared’, and you, Janele have made a huge impact in that native women’s life and made her feel cared for. Whoa! I’m going to cry again because you are such a light to those kids and families. Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing your heart and mind with the world. Thank you for accepting that woman as she is. You made her feel loved, care for, seen and heard. I love you, Janele. Muah Muah!!
Wow I really feel your words of love. Thanks Kels.